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The Pleasure Of Doing Business


“People think I’m such a bad guy, but they don’t realize what the world would be like without me.”


I get paid a lot for what I do. There’s no bragging when I say that. It’s just a fact. But there are reasons for that. The main one being there’s not many who do what I do—and even fewer who do it to my capability. Now, you might be asking, “What it is that I do?” And I would tell you, but I’m worried your feelings towards me might change afterwards. So, let’s just say I’m a… you know what, fuck it. I’m an assassin—a killer. Some might even call me a monster.

I know you have no judgement towards me. Though, I guess it might be a little tough for you to give any grievances considering the position you’re currently in. Being gagged and tied can make it a little difficult to voice one’s opinion. I’ll imagine that must be aggravating for you, being top dog of this little village of yours and all.

I hope you realize how special this is. I normally don’t go to these lengths for one of my jobs. Normally it’s not this personal. I prefer to work at a distance with a well-placed bullet. Or some strategically placed explosives. But I think you more than deserve some one-on-one treatment.

Once I read my file on you I was almost half-tempted to offer up my services pro bono. But I don’t need word getting out to my fellow associates—having them thinking I might’ve gone soft. That would be bad for business. Of course, not as bad as what you’ve been up to.

People think I’m such a bad guy, but they don’t realize what the world would be like without me. I don’t pretend I’m some kind of angel, but I do try to choose cases that allow me to take out the filth and trash like yourself. And you know just as well as I do that you deserve to be in the spot you are in right now.

I try to stay out of politics as much as I can. Then again, a job is a job. That’s my motto anyway. But every once in a while I come across someone like you. Someone who likes to rape the women in your village. Or forces the children to do your dirty work when it comes to the destruction of the neighboring villages because you don’t have the balls to do it yourself.

As much as I would like to think the people you’ve formally ruled over would like to hear the sounds you’re about to make, I’m going to play some music to help set the mood. I hope you’re well rested, because this is going to be more of a marathon than a sprint. Now, let’s begin so I can be done with you once and for all. There’s a couple more jobs I need to finish before I head back home.

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